Archive for February, 2006

My dad is cool.

Few people are as cool as my dad. He does cool stuff like fix John Deere tractors for fun and he has lots of cows. I like cows. Cows like noogies, breaking the water tank, and screwing up the sensor on the sprayer.

Can cows outsmart my dad, though? No way, man. He fixes the water tank and the sprayer like it’s his job. Conveniently, the cows break that stuff every time I go home. This means that my cool dad needs me to “help” him fix the stuff. Fortunately this just involves me following Dad down there and watching while he fixes it. I’d probably break it worse than the cows did.

My dad dominates real estate. He is so cool that people buy stuff from him just because he’s the greatest realtor in the world. They can, of course, tell this by looking at him. Dollar Generals must be good stores, because my dad thinks they’re cool. He likes to send Joey and I to take pictures of them. Hey everybody, shop at Dollar General.

My dad is the greatest dad ever because he takes me to the office with him when I come home. He makes me coffee (hyper!) and then we split bagels and I try to figure out how to do stuff for him. I probably don’t do it right but he still lets me help.

My dad is so cool that I can’t even list all the reasons. So I’ll just leave it at that for today. Salutations, Dad! (He likes red, so that’s why I made this red today. Red must be the coolest color.)

And that is why my dad is cool. (I bet your dad can’t top that!)

Yay Dad!

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Dun duh DUUUUH!

Jenna had an interview! A phone interview. (I’d take just about anything, though.) It’s just encouraging to know that yes, there is a possibility of freedom from Telemarketing Purgatory. The interview went pretty good, too, because she’s going to set up a face-to-face interview with me next week on Tuesday or Wednesday.

Oh, the glory.

Let’s take a few moments to ponder on the loveliness of new job prospects.
1. A new job wouldn’t have the scary elevators that we have in this building. Seriously, I don’t think they’ve done a thing to them since 1920. They make me all jibbly jibbly.
2. A new job would likely not have anybody threatening to blow me up with a shoe bomb. While we’ve all enjoyed laughing at that fool…seriously; he needs to get a hobby.
3. A new job would have a new set of co-worker quirks. (That could be good, but that could be bad, too.)
4. A new job could help restore some firmness to my brain. It’s been feeling increasingly mushy lately from all this monotony. I think I’m getting dumber.
5. A new job would completely eradicate the purpose for this blog!!! Now I know that everyone who actually reads this may fall into despair because this is the comedic highlight of your day, but I could probably blog about other, more exciting stuff. Not to worry.
6. Lastly, a new job would be FANTASTIC!

Now let’s not all think that I hate everything about telemarketing…just most stuff. I definitely like my two amigos from over the cubie wall. I may even sink into a deep sadness without them. But before I get to hasty…I don’t have a new job yet.

But I just had an INTERVIEW. We’ll take ‘em as we get ‘em.

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