This weekend, Joey and I are at FamilyLife’s Weekend to Remember conference in Grapevine.  So far it’s been rockstar awesome and we are having a fantastic time.  I may or may not post about it later.

Last night we left the Gaylord Texan resort a little bit late, about 10:00 and merged into a long, long line of cars waiting to exit the resort so that we could drive home.  It was very dark and I was very tired.  (I don’t operate well after, oh, 9:30 p.m.)  The oncoming lane of traffic was empty, and I stared half asleep into the darkness.

Then I saw a strange shape shuffling across the road.  It was oblong, had a tail, and was very low to the ground.  Was it….

“It’s an ARMORDILLO!!!” I screamed.  (And I am not kidding you, I screamed.)

Since we moved to Texas two years ago, it has been among my goals to see a live armadillo.  I have been foiled at every turn.  Even Joey, who absolutely cares nothing about armadillos, has seen one.  A couple things you must know about me, if you don’t know me very well, is that I love to see unusual things, and I love animals.  A first armadillo sighting seems to fit the category pretty well.  I was so eager about the possibility of seeing an armadillo that I began to choke up.  (Stop laughing.)

We were still waiting for the light to turn, and we were about twenty cars back from the light.  It was unlikely we’d make it through on the next cycle anyway.

“Get out of the car and go over there and check it out!” Joey encouraged me.

I hestiantly opened the car door, feeling kind of self conscious because of ALL THE PEOPLE WATCHING ME who were also sitting in their cars waiting for the light to turn, and then I ran across the road, straight at the armordillo.

It was huge.

I was kind of nervous because I didn’t know if armordillos were nice or mean, but I didn’t want to lose my opportunity.

Suddenly I heard Joey yell, “WAIT!  Stop!  Turn around, don’t go any closer!”

I stopped dead in my tracks.

“It’s a SKUNK!” He continued.  “COME BACK!”

Suddenly, the armordillo turned into the light and I saw its two very bright white stripes down its back and down its furry tail.  I was very, very close to the skunk, so close that I could see the moon giving the skunk’s soft coat a brilliant sheen.

I wonder what his fur feels like…I thought.  Then I remembered that skunks smell really bad if they spray you, and I began to worry about how I’d get back to the car.  The skunk was walking towards me at a very wombly pace, the kind of pace you’d expect from a fat, furry stinkbomb on legs.

I squealed with indecision, and then bolted across the still=empty lane of traffic and jumped into the backseat of our car.

The skunk followed me, sidling up to the curb next to where our car was, a mere 5 feet from me.  I rolled down my window and hung my torso out to get a good luck at the skunk.  Because I always carry my camera just in case stuff like this happens.

The light changed and oncoming traffic came down the empty lane towards the skunk, one car narrowly missing the stinky creature.  I was still hanging out the window looking at it, and I screamed, “NOOOOOOO!” Because, let’s face it, I’d never seen a skunk before either and it was almost as cool as an armadillo.

Soon we pulled away from the skunk and turned left to leave the resort.  I sighed contentedly and said, “I am happy I saw that skunk.  Did I ever mention how I like the smell of skunks?”

Joey looked at me with his look of chagrin. “You have mentioned it once or twice before.  I’d not broadcast that too loudly or people are really going to start thinking you’re weird.”

Oh well.

Back to the conference now…we’re sort of late for the after lunch session.

Maybe I’ll see an armadillo tonight when we leave.