Monday morning we woke up (after another 11 hours of sleep) and again loaded up my crossbody bag with water, electrolyte tablets, sunblock, camera and a bunch of other stuff.

We were ready to rock, roll and take the ruins of Tulum by storm.

So we jumped in yet another taxi and I asked him to take us to the Tulum ruins.  Apparently I did a good job, too, because the taxi driver said, “oh, you speak Spanish” and then started yammering off about something.  Then I had to say, “pequito”, and that was the end of that conversation.

He dropped us off about ten minutes and a bumpy ride later.

“I wasn’t really expecting to be dropped off at an empty road,” I said to Joey.  “What do you think we’re supposed to do?”

“Let’s start walking and see where it takes us.”

So off we went.

We walked for a very long time.  We saw lots of iguanas too, so that made it kind of worth it, but by the time we arrived at the ticket window, we had both sweated off all our sunblock.  I am rather paranoid about sunburns (please see here) and was not going to get burned this trip, no way no how.

“I’m not going to make it,” I panted as we walked up another flight of stairs and along yet another path.  Wherever they were hiding the ruins, I was really hoping we could find them soon.  It was, by this time, about 10:30 and probably 5,000 degrees outside.

“Let’s take that ramp instead of the stairs,” Joey suggested.

I was down with that.

The Tulum ruins site was carved right out of the jungle, much like a lot of things we saw.  On either side of the path was a dense forest of palm trees, vines, and probably poisonous snakes.

That is why we stayed out of it.

I was, like, really suffering by the time we FINALLY reached the entrance of the ruins.

Joey, on the other hand, was faring much better.

Once we got inside, I was rather dismayed to find NOT A SPECK OF SHADE to be found.  I don’t know where they put all the trees, but there weren’t many and there wasn’t any shade.

The ruins, though, were amazing.

I couldn’t believe the detail and intricacy of the stonework.  They’re not the oldest ruins I’ve seen, but they were the most impressive simply based on the fact that they were Mayan ruins…and not Roman ruins.  You assume Roman ruins will kick your butt with their Awesome because they had, what, 1,000 years to get good making fancy stone buildings?

The Mayans were just awesome in a can when it came to building stuff.

We were cheap and didn’t pay for a tour guide, so we just wandered around reapplying sunblock, drinking our electrolyte water and saying, “Woah, what is that” a lot.

Then I’d make up a scenario about how that flat part over there is where they performed human sacrifices and that spot over there is where they kept the people they were going to sacrifice, and Joey played along like he believed me.

Who knows, maybe he did.

Nah, we’ve been married for too long.  He’s on to me.

When we reached the beach (the Tulum ruins are special because they’re right on the beach) we found a sea turtle spawning area.  It’s that sandy spot on the right that looks like a beach, but DO NOT BE DECEIVED.  It is for sea turtles and it is where they do their thing, so don’t touch it.

I didn’t.

While Joey was photographing this red flower, a butterfly flew into the shot and he accidentally captured it.  I love this picture.

And here I am, disregarding the “do not go behind here” line.  It’s tradition.  The Kid and I always do it whenever possible, so I thought I might as well.

If I was a Mayan and I lived in Tulum, I think this spot right here is where I’d hang out a lot.  Isn’t that water blue and beautiful?  There are large rocks down below, so the sea crashes with great violence against them, and it sounds deliciously relaxing.

We decided to rest under a palm tree that had a tiny bit of shade.  There was a plaque with a map under it, so I thought I’d read it.  So I stood there and tried to translate sign. I was kind of stuck on the word caleta but I had the rest figured out.  I was getting frustrated about it when, suddenly, Joey says “Imagine the entrance to the cove illuminated by fire in order to orient the nocturnal navigators.”

Joey is lucky to remember donde esta el bano from Spanish class, so I just looked at him and said, in shock, “What the heck?!  How did you know what caleta means?”

He looked at me and then just started laughing.  “You didn’t see the English translation on the sign?”

No, I didn’t see the English translation.

We had a good laugh over this and Joey took a picture just because he’s weird like that.

Then, after we had hogged the speck of shade for as long as we thought was polite, we reapplied our sunblock and went back out into the elements.

Like I said, the Mayans could kick some butt with building stuff.  But I couldn’t tell you what they built.

If we had been thinking, we’d have brought our bathing suits and dove into the sea at the beach.  But we weren’t thinking, so we didn’t.

Either the Maya were short, or they built their doorways low.  Check out how I am so much taller than the door, y’all.

Look, he’s even got his Mountain Dew hat on in Mexico…

I can’t get over how blue that water is.  And all that in the background is ruins.

This was a really intricate building and wall structure.  It was about this time that, while we were probably about to die from electolyte depletion, we wished we had a tour guide.  Or at least a tour book.

We walked over to the far wall near the exit and Joey climbed up to get a better picture of the temple on the hill.  To the left in this picture is a bunch of palaces and suchlike, this I remember from snitching off other people’s tour guides.

Joey owned the wall and climbed it with dexterity and purpose.  I was proud to be his wife.

We made the long trek back to the taxi waiting area and asked for our driver to take us to the Subway we had seen in town.  We were starved and needed a good, cheap, filling meal.

It totally hit the spot.

And you know what?  Surprisingly, neither one of us got burned that day.  We used almost half of the bottle of sunblock, too, so I’m glad to know that stuff works.