We’re getting there.

After today, I have only four more pills to take and then it’s ULTRASOUND TIME, BABY.  Oh I can hardly wait.  I’m just shivering with anticipation.

Lies, I’m not.

But I’m expecting these ultrasounds and I’ve had time to get used to the idea, so I don’t think I’ll have a meltdown again.  And I’m willing to see that as a small amount of progress.

I was looking at my blister pack of birth control pills tonight, realizing how very close we are to being done with the setup phase of IVF.  It’s almost Go Time.  I can’t believe how fast the weeks went, and at the same time, they feel like they went so slowly.  I carried the little package of pills out and showed Joey how close we were, and how it didn’t even feel real.

And then we started talking about how really blessed we are.  We’re in a minority of couples (infertiles) and within that minority, we are getting to do IVF.  That’s an even small minority.  Just that realization kind of whacked us over and made us stop and think: maybe this is going to totally suck and totally stink for a few weeks.  But at least we can do it.  At least we can try.  We won’t have to spend the rest of our lives wondering “would that have worked for us?”

We get to know.

That’s something to be thankful for.  It’s getting easier and easier to find those things, and I feel like that’s the rainbow after the hurricane.

(Y’all remind me of that in about a week when I’m a raging, hormonal crankface.  I have a feeling I’ll need a Truth Slap now and then.)

My big box o’ shots arrives via FedEx on Tuesday.  You can bet I will be taking (and posting) pictures of all my medicines for maximum IVF Process Documentation, because I know that is why you all read this blog.  You can also rest easy that there will be ZERO pictures and/or videos of me shooting myself up.  First of all, I can guarantee you that none of you want or need to see my bare stomach (which is where the shots will go) and second of all, that’s just wrong and creepy on so many levels.  So for those of you who were worried?  Deleted.

Four more days of pills and then and ultrasound and then….it’s GO TIME!

ACK!

Can you believe it?!

I cannot.

I cannot.

I cannot.