Tag: cows

Cows Make The Best News Stories

I’m supposed to be cleaning my house, but since The Brother is on his way to Orlando and is currently in the air, I feel it is my duty to track his flight.  He seems safer if I’m watching what part of the country he’s flying over.  I don’t know, maybe I’m just mental.

In a last-ditch effort to avoid working, I decided to Google Image the phrase “large cow” to see what I could find.  (Not to worry, everyone.  I have my Google Images filter on “safe”.)

There was a surprising number of pictures of large cows.

My favorite, though, was a large, pregnant cow chasing a bunch of scared-looking men.  Actually they kind of looked like girls because they are all running away from the cow.  Observe:

This cow got loose at the Kalamazoo County Fair back in 2009 and was running rampant for, like, 45 minutes before someone restrained it.  She even knocked over a bunch of pedestrians while she was charging around.  Only one person was taken to the hospital.

I so wish I could say I was knocked over by a pregnant cow.

Sometimes I feel like a pregnant cow.

Maybe I should just knock myself over.

The Lairdmobile

At 4:06 this morning I received a text from Pops informing me that the Lairdmobile was on the move. Fortunately my phone was on silent because between Pops, The Kid, and Brother, I had like 4 texts by the time I woke up at 6:00.

They are coming South for Joey’s graduation, and then on Sunday we’ll head up to Oklahoma to spend a week at a resort on Grand Lake. Ahhhhhhh. (Well, for me it’s just five days because we have to come back to Dallas on Thursday. But who’s counting.)

Anyway, somehow the Lairdmobile managed to drive off without any maps. This has only been a problem one time…but I’m really not sure how they’re going to make it through Dallas to our apartment without any maps. Maybe Brother’s photographic memory will save the day.

Oh wait, Brother doesn’t even have a photographic memory.

They’re sunk, y’all.

I recommended that they stop at the cattle pens in Kansas (which I am obsessed with, there are NEVER ANY CATTLE IN THEM AND IT DRIVES ME CRAZY) so they could stretch their legs.  I really didn’t think they would, since they did sort of get lost earlier and were therefore behind schedule…but just a few minutes ago I received a very surprising picture from my Pops.

Internet, my family is my hero.  CATTLE PENS!  I hope Pops took like a jillion pictures.

(And I have to admit, the first time I looked at this picture I thought EW SICK, why is That Kid not wearing a shirt?  Kid.  Seriously.  Get a shirt that’s a more differenter color than your skin.  Grosses me out.)